Of Facebook Worshipping.

I joined Facebook as a result of eavesdropping. I was in my first year and was sharing a suite with three other people in a hostel. It had two rooms and two people shared each room. The galz in the other room were rather cool, advanced, admirable. They had laptops, Tv, mobile wardrobes, even cutlery! We had nothing. I’m glad iPads weren’t a fad at a time.

They would have had them.

I had over heard them talk about Facebook several times before. This time, I listened in to the whole conversation .

‘Hey, are you friends with GG on facebook? 

‘No. Meanwhile TT poked me! ‘ 

‘Aaah that guy ain’t cool. He writes weird things on my wall ‘

 ‘Yeah, i noticed. His updates always show up on my homepage.’

I was sure that I would never afford to buy Facebook. Where the heck was I going to find wall, notifications, poke( Pork? I knew where to find pork), home page etc. I couldnt figure out how the wall at our home and pages in my books would be of help in discovering Facebook.

Every day, I accepted that those babes were from rich families and I would never parallel them. Ever!

I also noticed whenever they spoke of Facebook, they had been clinging onto their expensive phones, scrolling and pressing buttons non stop. I checked my Nokia 2310 for any clues to Facebook 

and there was none.

I used to go to the nearby cafe to check my mail and my hi5 account. Part of me was convinced that however rich they were, perhaps they had no idea what hi5 was all about. I intended to tell them about it as soon as we grew closer as Suitemates.

While at the cafe, I tried searching for the meaning of Facebook. I saw sign up options. I did. I tried to read more about it. I Learnt it was a way of connecting with friends all over the world. Just like hi5.

I didn’t know what to do next. I signed out. Next time in the cafe I found one friend request. I accepted it and learned that people could actually send and accept requests. I got myself a hobby.

The easiest thing was the question. ‘Whats on your mind?’ I wondered why other institutions I had been too weren’t as understanding, simplistic and precise as Facebook. I also thought it was a must to accept all friend requests, comment on everyone’s status, poke back and reply all chats lest you be punished by the Headmaster and then expelled.

Facebook started feeling like a chore. I lost some calories and focus on my studies for sometime.

Before Facebook, the in thing was the conference calls on Warid Pakalast.(The one that got hitched recently.) We would talk all day and night. Ears would hurt, calm down and hurt again. Till Facebook. I told friends about it but some didn’t even know how to use a computer.

Fast forward >>>>>

Facebook is now a god. Everyone can have it. Even the poor. My rich former roommates must now be on something else beyond Twitter and Instagram. Perhaps Amazon or Weed? I hope they are not on weed. Their heads run on android o.s maybe? We will get there too.

People care so much about Facebook. They Worship, adore, obey, like and share it’s word. Instead of wondering ‘what would God think of me’, they wonder ‘ how will people on Facebook take this. Recently I was watching an episode of Royal Pains where a patient was diagnosed with some weird ailment. Her comment was, ‘ eeeew, this will make the weirdest status update ever!’. 

From that statement you realize that she feels compelled to update her status about anything in her life. And then it worries her more than what she’s suffering from.

People have kinda lost it.

There’s this babe who got involved in an accident . The house broke down on her with a friend. Building materials were covering them and white dust posed as powder on them. She remembered she had her phone and got it out to write an update. I guess as she wrote it, she realized people wouldn’t believe her.

Seeing is believing.

She stretched her hand.’Sherry, here, can you reach my phone, take me a pic for fb.’Sherry started whining. She got the phone anyway. The damsel under distress could afford asmile as they waited for help.

So there was a pic of her and an update that read, ‘ me and Sherry trapped under collapsed building.’ You could think there was something to brag about.